Fat Little Babies

No, I'm not about to write about obese children. I'm also not going to talk about how it took me eight tries to realize that "obese" doesn't have a "c" in it. I've been spelling that wrong for 20 bloody years. Apparently, I rarely write about obese...anything.

Maybe I should. Why are all of my characters so skinny? Like, eat a f*cking sandwich.

Hells bells, I've wandered. I'm not sure I ever even really had a track. Why did I call this "Fat Little Babies"? I brought this on myself.

 Believe it or not, this blog is about my 2nd Editions. They're done, they're beautiful, and they're slightly pudgier than the originals. Actually, they would have been slightly pudgier, but then I realized that would mean I have to redesign the cover, and I didn't want to resubmit it (there's a $49 fee every time you do that, and I've already dinked up and had to redo it twice). So instead, I worked with the spacing and was able to keep the 2nd Edition hard covers the same size.

Of course, the brilliant computers don't care that the interior I resubmitted is the same size as the originals, and thereby doesn't need a different cover. I was informed that it was the exterior that the problem was with, and no amount of whining could convince them otherwise. So, long-story-chopped-slightly-shorter, I ended up resubmitting both cover and interior anyway.

So the books are now appropriate for Young Adult audiences. There's still some light swearing, and to quote the 13-15-something boy at the Twin Cities Book Festival last weekend, "That's literally nothing." 

If light swearing still bothers you, I might recommend you read more.

Am I feeling snarky, you ask? Well, not particularly. I caught a cold, but I always do after big festivals. I'm a bit sassy, and I can't breathe--which usually lends a bit of an edge to the sass--but screw it. I'm an hour and twenty away from a dirty martini and the weekend, so I literally don't give a f*ck.

See that? Light swearing. Well, strong swearing masquerading in a kid-friendly fashion. And no, that's not how I took the F-bombs out of my book. I got creative with it. Want to know how? Follow this link and don't think too much about money. 

Look at that! My blog's first hyperlink! I hope it works, but something about the way my day has been going tells me that it won't. Or that it will link you to the darker edges of the interwebs. If that's the case, follow the rabbit hole and let me know where it ends.

(It's a trick. It never ends. You just eventually get tired of screaming.)

Speaking of things that never end and lots of screaming, I'm writing Book Two of the Firebird Chronicles. I want this one to sit at 80,000 words, compared to the first one's 50,000.

One of the new reviews on Amazon (BTW THANK YOU HUMANS, REVIEWS ARE LIFE AND YOU'RE AWESOME. You know who you are, and I love you.) mentioned that I need more character development. And I couldn't agree more. My books usually wander endlessly through backstories, interactions, and every other kind of beginning. But Firebird...well, I wanted a quick, easy, catchy read. I wanted something that I could publish right off the bat, because if I'm being honest, I was feeling rebellious and these women gave me a voice. 

But it's Book Two now, and I'm ready to get into the meat of the story. Harry and her relationship with Overlord Mariana. Ori and Regina and the messes they made. Laurensen's lighter side, Brute's darker one. Jezi and her place on the crew. All of it. Sometimes, my fingers can't keep up.

So, Book Two will be all about the characters. It will be darker, richer, and oh so sexy. Like chocolate and scotch and a little bit of fire.

And yes, Book Two does have a name. And no, it isn't "Book Two". This time around, I'm going to have a bit more scheduling. Mostly because I want to have a huge Martian-themed Cover Reveal party with whiskey, fedoras, and lots and lots of dancing. But also because I'm a responsible author who listens to advice and plans accordingly.

But yeah, also the party. A lovely lady already volunteered to make a cake with the cover on it. So, stay tuned.

Peace and prosperity and all that jazz,


P.S. I'd like to start selling the books on my birthday, May 14th, because I'm a dork. So the Cover Reveal will come around New Year's. Pub date will be around April 7th, because that's my sister's birthday. And the title reveal? Well, that's coming up in the next blog.

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